So, where were we?

Research has begun.
Since Mondays are usually disastrous I will start with a fairly whimsical commentary on doing research via youtube.

1. Coming out videos. The popular ones feature beautiful boys and girls, men and women and I suspect because I am old, the girls and boys are older than they seem to me, telling me - I mean youtube-at-large that they are in fact gay and then they invariably burst into tears. At first, this made me very uncomfortable, I had to watch about 6 of them before I realized why.  The very pretty young woman would smile at the webcam, thank everyone for their continued support, I would look at the 500,000 plus subscribers (a few have over 1million) and then announce that they were, in fact, gay and they were coming out to the world and then, as if on cue, burst into tears or weep in a very appealing fashion. It comes across as rehearsed, I am not saying it's not genuine- hell if I came out as heterosexual, I would be a nervous wreck and probably have to do a dozen takes before giving up and choosing the least horrendous one. It just seems to be contrived. In all my viewings, and I realize I have but scratched the tip of the ice cap on top of the mountain here, there wasn't a single one where I got any other feeling but relief. I mean bursting into tears of.... that's what I mean. I sat there thinking: are they happy and crying? are they relieved they could finally say this and not implode? are they sad? mad? embarrassed? just being emotional (insert sexist slur)? Nope, I still don't know. I need Deadpool. I need Shakespeare. I need an aside. The reason I am crying here at this point in the video is because: (insert a reason why you are crying).
   I am not a bastard despite what you are thinking, I am a writer looking for a reason, an actor waiting for a motivation, "cue crying, what is my motivation for crying?" 
2. I was disappointed that youtube appears to only feature the beautiful (by pop culture standards) on every video I found. Admittedly I only tried for 30 minutes to find a less than ideal woman or man talking about coming out. I ended up with what I was almost sure was going to be a misogynist bashing coming out videos and found at least a better point of view.  His name is Onison. I did watch quite a few of his videos and his wife's. He's a really egocentric borderline asshole  who I find very insightful and amusing. I gave up after that.
3. The bisexual websites were at once confusing, buy this book, dig through this community discussion board on Reddit (I love Reddit but it's a full-time commitment finding the answers there) or go to a blog that makes absolutely no sense (of course it was 11:30 and my body can't decide if I am a night owl anymore or if I ever was). I tried a few "things you should never say to a bisexual" videos and posts and rolled my eyes because they were things you shouldn't say to anyone unless you are in deathmatch on Halo and the guy you are saying them to is 17 years old with the maturity of a 5-year-old and just called you mother an unseemly term implying that you should just off yourself right at that moment. But I digress.
   In short, not helpful.
4. The polyamory sites and pages were somewhat helpful in at least clarifying that there are multiple types of polyamory and what I thought it was - wasn't exactly what those sites say it is- if that makes sense. It did concrete some things for the plot of the novel.

Finally, I am reaching out to anyone, who is willing to start a conversation with me. I really want to get this novel written without screwing it up. I know that this is just surface stuff as I am really writing a book about relationships and the nature of love.

Everything else is really setting, I just want it to be believable and accurate.

I promise the next post will be something more along the lines of what I originally planned to post. let the character exploration re-commence!